November 2007


Even though we were willing to wait until the girl was ready to talk to her mom, the mom wasn’t.  After four great days together, on Monday Miguel’s ex went to school early and took the girl out by force.  She’s been locked in her room since yesterday afternoon and didn’t go to school today.  Miguel has called several times and went by to pick her up for school this morning but, of course, they won’t let him speak to her.

Miguel is ready to fight for her – not that she come live with us, but that she be treated with respect and not be abused.  We are waiting to see how long the ex refuses to let Miguel speak to the girl and to see if the abuse has started up again.  We hope that the mom now knows that the girl will leave if maltreated.

By the way, if it seems strange that I refer to her as “the girl” and “the daughter” please understand that it is for our own safety.  There are many unwritten rules on blogging and one of them is to limit personal information.  So, you’ll notice, no names appear on this blog except mine and Miguel.

There is no Thanksgiving holiday in Mexico, but it’s great having a four day weekend any time of the year.  Especially when one’s step-daughter decides on Wednesday that she no longer wants to live with her abusive mother and comes to join your happy family in a 2-room house without a kitchen.  She reports sleeping better on our couch than she has ever slept in her life. 

I’m just happy to know that she isn’t being abused any more (physical and mental).  In Mexico, there’s really nothing one can do to intervene in such a situation between mother and daughter and the child making this decision is the only way to end such activity.  We’re really proud of her and hope that she sticks with her decision.  She is only 11 and with regard to her mother has always had very low self-esteem and been easily manipulable.  She seems to know her limits, though, and has asked not to speak to her mother until she’s ready and we are definitely honoring that request. 

Her mother is predictably quite unhappy and pulling all the shenanigans she is capable of.  She has refused to let us pick up anything but the girl’s catechism book and we must, in her words “start from zero” – even being forced to purchase new school text books.  The irony is not lost on any of us.

So, six months before my 50th birthday, I have become a full-time mother.  Happy Thanks Giving !